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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28804101">Not What He Seems</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommonColin/pseuds/CommonColin'>CommonColin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Explicit Language, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Minerva McGonagall, angst with a decent ending, bad lucius malfoy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:55:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,029</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28804101</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommonColin/pseuds/CommonColin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It's only natural for a first year to be nervous, joining their house table after the sorting. That's why a young Severus Snape, separated from his best friend and desperate to make a good first impression, was pleased to be greeted by such a kind 5th year prefect. So pleased, in fact, that he was able to convince himself that everything was fine.<br/>Until it wasn't.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lucius Malfoy/Severus Snape</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Not What He Seems</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Not beta read. Trigger warning for rape and sexual predators.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>First Year</em>
</p>
<p>     "<em>Slytherin!</em>"</p>
<p>     It wasn't unexpected, or even unwelcome. In fact, this had been exactly what he wanted, wasn't it? Yes, of course it was, though he'd hoped that he might still be with Lily. "Space allows relationships more room to grow," that's what Ma sometimes said. </p>
<p>     Right.</p>
<p>     And so, Severus took one of the first seats he could find at the Slytherin table, near the end but not quite at it. Not too alienating, not too bold, just the way he liked it. He found himself next to one of the prefects, a fifth year by the looks of it. </p>
<p>     "Lucius Malfoy," he gave Severus a polite but curious smile and stuck out his hand. Severus eyed him curiously. <em>Malfoy</em>, it sounded familiar, likely a pureblood family name. He grabbed his hand and shook it, firm but not tight. The one decent thing his da ever taught him.</p>
<p>     "Severus Snape."</p>
<p>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>     Lucius seemed a decent person, that was Severus's first conclusion over the next few days. He was helpful, getting students settled into their dorms, and kind, going out of his way to make conversation with the new housemates. It was through these conversations that he began to take an extra interest in Severus, the lower class halfblood with a scruffy accent who said "fuck" more than he said "thank you", all of which were traits no other Slytherin seemed to share. Not in public anyways. </p>
<p>     But as days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months, "decent" turned to "nice" turned to "trustworthy". Being something of an outlier among the Slytherins, Severus was struggling, socially, on his own. But Lucius seemed friendly, inviting him into conversations, and introducing him to people, even to his fiancé. </p>
<p>     "Severus, if I may introduce my dearest friend and future wife, Narcissa Black," he approached one night arm in arm with a girl, younger than himself but still older than Severus, with skin so pale it was nearly translucent and eyes so light a blue they could be white. The word 'albino' came to mind as he shook her hand.  </p>
<p>     Severus got on nicely with Narcissa, and by final exams they would each consider the other a friend. He still had Lily of course, but it was nice to have people in his own house to confide in, and while he wasn't on bad terms with his dormmates, he could hardly call any of them friends. He felt as though he had been adopted, by both Narcissa and Lucius, but as more of a sibling than a child, and while this thought had initially been daunting, he grew to revel in it. </p>
<p>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>
  <em>Second Year</em>
</p>
<p>     Over the summer, for the first time, Severus received multiple letters from multiple people. While his da was out at the factory or the pub, he happily corresponded with Narcissa, the occasional dormmate, and Lucius. Especially Lucius. He didn't quite understand what a now 6th year would ever want to do with a 2nd year, but it didn't seem to matter. Lucius seemed good, Lucius seemed trustworthy. And that was the important part. </p>
<p>     So, gathering in the Great Hall for the sorting ceremony, nothing seemed out of place when he waved Severus over to sit with him and put a casual hand on his shoulder. Nothing seemed out of place when, back in the common room, after most of the students had retired to bed, he gave him a very brief hug and said "welcome back". Nothing seemed off, not to Severus. </p>
<p>     Narcissa, who had witnessed all of it, disagreed.</p>
<p>     Narcissa disagreed because she knew Lucius, and as affectionate as he could be when the occasion called for it, Lucius was not a tactile person, not by any means. Lucius rarely touched her casually, and Lucius never hugged her like that, brief as it may have been. Everything was out of place to Narcissa, who was equal parts confused and concerned. </p>
<p>     But Severus slept soundly, none the wiser. Lucius seemed sincere, so what did it matter?</p>
<p>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>     It mattered. </p>
<p>     It took approximately four months of steadily bolder and increasingly more private affections for Severus to realize that it did, in fact, matter. At this point in time, he was not very experienced in sensing people's intentions, but he wasn't stupid either, and he would have to be to not realize what was going on. </p>
<p>     It was January, just a few days past his birthday, and he was learning to play wizard chess with a set that he'd been gifted from one of his dormmates, who were beginning to warm up to him. Narcissa had pulled him away from Lucius to play, as she was doing more frequently these days, but upon hearing that he didn't know how to play, Lucius decided to join them to teach him. At least, that was what he'd said.</p>
<p>     They settled into a routine, Narcissa and Severus would play, Lucius would spectate, and when Severus wasn't sure where to move a piece, Lucius would move right up close to him and whisper pointers to him. The, he would move back to the other side of the board. Until one time, he didn't. </p>
<p>     Long term physical closeness wasn't exactly Severus's forte on its own, but he handled it fine until there was a hand on his knee. Even though it was hidden by the board, something on his face must have given it away, because Narcissa gave him a significant look as if to say "what do I do?". And, of course, the answer was nothing, because by now, Severus knew things. He knew that Narcissa was bound by contract to support Lucius's actions, and he knew that no one in their right mind would challenge a Malfoy anyways. So Severus was stuck in whatever hell hole he was stuck in, though he wasn't sure exactly how deep it was until about a week later, when a rather loud nightmare had a 6th year prefect in his dorm, then in his bed, and ultimately in the very nightmares he claimed to be "helping" with. </p>
<p>------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>     Lily knew something was wrong. She had known for a while, but it wasn't until mid-March that she had decided to finally ask about it. </p>
<p>     "Sev," she started as gently as possible, "you look like you haven't slept in weeks."</p>
<p>     "I'm sleeping fine, Lily." He wasn't. But that was that.</p>
<p>-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>
  <em>Third Year</em>
</p>
<p>     Third year was a blur of pain. Physical, mental, emotional, every type of pain, because no, it was not a one time incident.</p>
<p>     By now, Narcissa knew what was going on. She never confronted Severus about it, for which he was silently thankful. She never confronted Lucius about it because what could she possibly do? But she saw the way her friend sunk deeper into himself, silently suffering with nowhere to turn. But at least he was still speaking to her, and she felt that was as much as she could hope at the moment. </p>
<p>     Unfortunately for Severus, where Narcissa saw suffering, Lily saw lies. Yes, she knew something was wrong and she knew that it seemed a sensitive matter, but he wouldn't speak to her. Not about whatever it was. And as much as he knew she was only trying to help, he knew he couldn't talk to her about this because what would she do? Tell someone who couldn't help? Worry aimlessly? No, that wouldn't do at all, so he kept to himself and hoped she would eventually stop asking. And she did, eventually, but as she did, and undeniable rift could be felt growing between them.</p>
<p>On the bright side, it was Lucius's final year at Hogwarts. </p>
<p>------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>
  <em>Sixth Year</em>
</p>
<p>     His first meeting had been a breeze, though if he was completely honest with himself, Severus still wasn't entirely sure what he was doing there. Perhaps looking for someone to fit in with after <em>The Incident</em>. </p>
<p>     That's what it had become, in this head. <em>The Incident</em>. There were actually many Incidents by this point in his life, but this one, being so fresh and ready to attack in his mind, had gained the official title. But Regulus, who was still too young to attend, had told him he might get on with some of the people there. He wasn't wrong, as even though he had yet to meet this "Dark Lord" everyone was raving on about, most of the people there had been wronged in some way or another, especially by muggles.</p>
<p>     Severus could work with that. </p>
<p>     Narcissa was there, which he was pleased about. Though she mostly sat in silence alongside her very soon-to-be husband, which Severus was significantly less pleased about. </p>
<p>     It's not that this was the first time he had seen Lucius since his graduation. No, they seemed to run into each other quite often, especially when students were due to visit Hogsmeade in bathrooms, alleyways, and behind secluded buildings. And even though Severus hated every time more than the last, that wasn't what he dreaded most today. Today, there was a conversation to be had, and no outcome was a good one. </p>
<p>     "Have you thought any more about my offer?" Lucius steered him into the Hogs Head back room to interrogate him.</p>
<p>     Over the summer, Severus had been invited to pay a brief visit to Malfoy manner for the first time, invited not by Lucius, but by his father, Abraxas. He could hardly refuse the man, so he accepted with a heavy mind. Once there, he was given what could have been the best news of his life, if only under different circumstances. </p>
<p>     "My son would like to invest in you," Abraxas told him with a pleased, and mildly expectant, look. "University, apprenticeship, whatever it may be that your future holds, my son has seen extreme potential in it and would like to assist you. All we ask in return is that you assist us as well, should the time ever come."</p>
<p>     Severus knew that he didn't have the money for university, or the connections for a decent apprenticeship. Not on his own. It was a near flawless offer, and it was quickly made clear to him that others knew about it too. He would look like a fool not to accept. But even though Lucius wasn't there, even though he never said it, he understood the implication. There was a price involved in this offer, and Severus was not willing to pay it. </p>
<p>     "I'm... still unsure," back in the present, Severus responded.</p>
<p>     "Still unsure?" Lucius was moving in on him. There was no way out; this was happening with or without the future education.</p>
<p>     "I suppose I would be a fool to refuse?" it was more of a question than an answer, but there was nothing more to say.</p>
<p>     "Indeed, but you would." There were hands on him.</p>
<p>     "Wait-- not here, wait, stop!" </p>
<p>     He didn't. </p>
<p>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p>
<p>
  <em>1996</em>
</p>
<p>     It was plastered all over the front page. <em>Ministry Raid: Death Eaters Sentenced to Azkaban!</em></p>
<p>     Among them, Lucius Malfoy. </p>
<p>     Severus didn't go to breakfast that morning; instead he comforted a student, the son of a true friend, a child processing the absence of a father, not a death eater. </p>
<p>     He didn't go to lunch either; instead he checked up on Narcissa, one of his few real friends in the world, who, despite everything he'd done, he knew still loved her husband.</p>
<p>     He avoided diner, when the sudden reality of relief and fear and all sorts of conflicting emotions crashed down around him all at once. And at 7:30 when Minerva finally came looking for him and found him somewhere between choking and vomiting, he wasn't entirely sure why either. </p>
<p>     But Minerva, ever the mother that she was, simply made tea and sat in his quarters with him. Though she couldn't be entirely sure what was going on, she had a feeling it was something involving a first year Slytherin and a seemingly friendly fifth year prefect. Her ideas were only confirmed an hour later with three little words no one as protective as Minerva McGonagall ever wants to hear.</p>
<p>     "I was raped."</p>
<p>     It was quiet, but it was enough. Now was not the time for questions. </p>
<p>     Now was the time to start picking up the pieces. </p>
<p>     </p>
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